EYES OF RAGE
The expression "seeing red" is literally true when it comes to anger. Red is the color of the first chakra (groin area) and related to survival. Anger energy in me comes up into the eyes and blinds me with rage because of hurt and shame. When I clear out the anger and rage then my eyes clear as well.
Anger happens because of hurt or shame. This is what I saw when I was working with my anger and trying to resolve it.
My eyesight is not great. While there are many reasons for that including close up computer work and other factors and it seems that lots of energy gets locked up in the eyes. In fact, it seems that most, if not all, energy being released from my body is also released from my eyes and the muscles around the eyes at the same time.
I'll talk more later but I was very, very angry for a long, long time. I was so angry because I was never really allowed to express it at home, or I felt afraid that I would be abandoned if I showed my anger. My anger was not okay but neither was expressing any other emotion or feeling. I was angry at God for what happened. I was angry at my parents for not teaching me better emotional life skills. I was angry at myself for not being able to protect myself in some ways. I didn't let people or men hit or physically abuse me but I couldn't stop a man from stalking and attacking me after I left him despite a restraining order. I filed charges against him and he was prosecuted but he still came after me again and again. I was angry at people for hurting me. I was scared and hurt and I was made to feel ashamed about some things that I had done. I didn't understand that my behavior was not me and so my whole self felt ashamed. I didn't have any emotional support from my parents because they didn't know how. The list goes on and on about why I was angry at the time - mostly this is held in anger because I didn't know how to resolve conflict and have better skills.....
This is an example of "dirt" in the eyes. Dirt is anger, rage, jealousy, grief, pain - physical or mental, etc.
There is so, so….. much rage and anger at being ignored emotionally and spiritually and especially from when I was a small child. I am angry at God especially at the moment for letting things happen to me. I do not understand why this world has to be so painful. This anger is what blinds me and is responsible for much of the dirt in my spiritual eye. This pain and energy is coming from my crown chakra or “mind’s eye” area. Imagine how free we could or can be if we never hold all of this stuff inside of us.
Thankfully I can talk to God and Christ about what is happening. Father does kinda sit me down and have a chat with me about what is happening and why. He is patient and firm and tries to explain it to me. I am like an angry kid who doesn't understand it from a parent's point of view. Seriously though. Thankfully I can talk to Him about it and I can hear what He has to say to me. It makes all of the difference in the world that I can have a conversation with Him. I'm not going to tell you what He said to me but I will tell you that you can talk to Him or His son about anything and you will be heard, listened to and spoken to like a person.