Save Our Spirits

Dedicated to helping you get in touch with your spirit and with life again.
Dedicated to promoting wellness and a sense of being whole in all areas of our lives.
Dedicated to helping people live their lives joyfully, strongly, fully and freely.

Become whole. Become who you are in the here and now.
Become who you were created to be - a reflection of love.
   Heal your body.      Heal your mind.      Heal your soul.

Bag O' Dirt etc...


here's the dirt...

                                                  BAG O' DIRT....
                                                    August 20, 2012

This isn't  going to be about any dirty laundry but it is about the "dirt" that we carry around in our lives and some examples of how I got the dirt out of my life. What I wanted to give you in this section are some examples of talking to your spirit...all of the pain, fear, sorrow, rage, etc. that we carry around becomes the dirt in our eyes and blinds us to whatever is real and true in many ways. Not only is the energy held in our bodies but it also helps to make everything else in our lives cloudy with those energies. This would be something like "seeing red" with anger or rage or wearing "rose-colored glasses."

I also say that these energies can be like the dirt and that these feelings blind us is because the energy releases are also reflected in the eyes. When I release energy from somewhere in my body it is also released from, in and around the eyes. Based upon years of experience with working with the energy in my body, it seems that everything that is happening in my body is reflected in my eyes. The clarity, the musculature, the very energy of the eyes, whether or not I felt that I had to look down at the ground symbolic of defeat of the spirit and how I can look up firmly with the strength of my spirit reflected in my eyes.

  I think there is something very special about the eyes...of anyone...I think more than any other part of our body, they reveal what is really inside of us.

I want others to know that working with these energies is difficult at times but also that the release of these energies results in a freedom of spirit, freedom from things that have bothered one for a long time, a sense of peace and calm, resolution and more love and joy in one's life. As I released the old energies, and I had many you guys because I held everything inside of me and I had nobody to really talk to, I found my spirit and my wholeness with myself again. I found laughter, joy and freedom in this effort of mine. As I learned new skills and I was able to communicate with others in a healthier manner I no longer held so much inside of me. As I released the old energies and didn't hold on to so much, my life became more calm, more real, more free and I became less depressed and my symptoms left. Some of this is difficult but the rewards are more than worth any effort that I put out to recover my life. I think that if I could have let more love into my life, which others seem to have a much easier time doing than me, that the whole effort would have been much, much easier. Still, I found love and a connection with something bigger than myself and a peace and wholeness that I never dreamt was possible in this doing. So can you if that is what you want.

At this moment, I feel and I wonder that if one cleared out the heart first by sharing love if everything else would fall away. I tried to clear everything because I guess that is the way that I had to do it for myself but in retrospect and in considering how I feel now that my heart is free, that maybe it might have been a lot easier if I would have focused on that connection in the heart and not worried about all the rest. I don't know the answer to this but it is just a thought for all of you to consider.

Try to balance the energies of the mind and the heart instead of letting the mind rule as many of us do. Aim for a little extra heart energy over the mind energy.

As I discussed in the Fear, energy and PTSD article, God/Father helped me to understand that because of the attacks and the trauma by a very angry man, I was unable to see that some men wanted to love me. Instead, if anyone did anything like what happened to me during the attacks, like coming up behind me, then it triggered fear from the trauma and I panicked. Because of all of the fear I had inside of me, I could only see the world as a dangerous place where men were out to hurt me instead of wanting to be friendly. When I cleared out the fear, the trauma and the pain, I no longer felt so afraid to get close to others or to let them into my life.

Any kind of anger, resentment or hate held in the body can contribute to cancer. Of course this doesn't mean that you won't get it if you don't have any of these feelings in your body. Cancer is also of  the energy of being "eaten up by something"  as well as a lack of love or lack of self-love. It can also be a reflection of the acidity of our body tissues because cancer feeds upon and eats up the nasty stuff in our bodies and lives in a "dirty" or energetically low, oxygen-deprived kind of environment. Maybe it is also a reflection of a lack of power or helplessness or of feeling a victim in life in society as a whole. Maybe it is also related to suffering and karma to help atone for our sins and some of the sins in the world as we work for and with Christ and let Him into our lives. While these observations may not address all of the reasons for cancer these factors could certainly apply to its formation. The energies can be gotten rid of and your body restored to health in a natural manner. See the information on pH balance and acid/alkaline balance in the Misc Resources section.

We do have choices in our lives and we do have control and power over some things. Maybe we cannot see them yet but it doesn't mean that they are not there. There is so much more we can do in our lives to help prevent this disease than we have been told. I do not feel that we are or should be at the mercy of this or any other illness as we have been told. We just don't know how to go about addressing the issues beyond the physical in our world today for the most part. Nutrition and exercise play a big part in the formation of disease but many diseases start in our energetic bodies and then finally manifest in our physical bodies. Maybe it's no guarantee because there might be a lot more involved than I am aware of at this time but these are some of the energies and things that I feel can contribute to its formation and we have control over these things in our lives. These energies do not even begin to take into consideration the pollution and toxins in our food, our water, our air and the rest of our world that affect us as well but even those things can be changed or removed. We have much more control over what is happening than we realize. We also have much more of an effect on our environment as well just by the kinds of energies that we are holding in our bodies or putting out into the world.

We also have control over the energies that we allow into our lives and into the world. We have control over whether or not we watch or listen to violence, murder, fear, rage, evil or anything else. If we allow these energies into our lives in any way then they can influence how we feel or "see" the world. If we do not like what the news is doing or movies being shown then we always have the choice to complain, to not watch this kind of programming, to request that these companies make changes or to not buy or otherwise support these kinds of energies or allow them into our lives in any way. We can learn new ways and healthier ways. We do have power and control over our lives.

I have found in my own life that if I remove all the darker energies and put in lighter and more Godly energies then it is easier to stay in a place where I am connected with God and with Christ. Our holy medals, crosses and crucifixes help protect us as well. Prayer is a very powerful protector. In the Catholic tradition, the Hail Mary is a powerful strengthener of the lower part of the body and the Our Father is a powerful strengthener of the upper body. As more and more of the joy of Christ fills my heart and body, my spirit feels more free and more connected to God. We literally do put on a new man or Christ as we connect to God. He holds us like a prayer and protects us from harm with His love, mercy and grace.


This book really helped me figure out what were some of the reasons for the aches and pains and illness
 that I either had or was experiencing in my physical body. I found that in general energies tend to be held
 in certain parts of the body. It appears that the same energies are held in the same parts of the body for  many people. An example would be that anger is stored in the liver area or that fear and grief can  get lodged or stuck in the lungs.

Hay, Louise L., Heal Your Body, The Mental Causes for Physical Illness and the Metaphysical Way to Overcome Them, Carlsbad, CA, Hay House, Inc., 1988.

This is an article on “Learning to Feel” by Walter Last. It contains some practical exercises for feeling your feelings, how we build “armor” around us to protect us, mirror exercises, feeling exercises, letting go exercises, emotions, body language and much, much more information. Give this a go.

To help you understand some of the terminology and about the energy centers and fields of the body, please see the sites listed below for some basic information. Personally, I feel that sound, energy, color and such are all neutral energies. It is how they are used, by whom and the intent with which they are used that create the differences between so-called "good" and "evil." I also believe that one is much better off working only with God and/or Christ when working with these energies, your feelings and such because of the potential danger of being tricked by the dark side. I would recommend that people try to develop a personal relationship with God and Christ not put spirit guides, masters, outside energies and such between yourself and God. I am just trying to make you aware of some things but I don't want to frighten you unnecessarily. Evil or dark energies cannot hurt you if you are protected by God and they cannot just enter your life or your energy field without some kind of invitation or letting in by you. I had unknowingly invited the dark side into my life when I was following some of the new age teachings so I also had to kick them out as well.

We are more than physical bodies and we do have a spirit that does not have a physical form but we do need to have protection from God. We can help ourselves but I do not feel that we can do it alone.
I am putting these warnings in this effort not to scare you but because there are so many people out there involved in occult [hidden] doings (white or black magic, psychic readings, tarot cards, channeling, secret societies, etc.) which either knowingly or unknowingly puts them in danger. Too many people have been confused and deceived and thus this is an effort to let others know of the dangers that I encountered. I feel that we have these abilities naturally but it is not necessary to develop these abilities to go Home. Most of us do not have any idea what exists on the other dimensions and many have no idea who and what they are really dealing with. It's probably not "Aunt June" who they are talking to but some demons or fallen angels who can fool us because they know these things. The most dangerous appear to be the lower dimensions such as the astral plane anyways, and much of what exists there is not nice and loving. There is true evil as well. It is for your own protection to stay away from these practices. If it helps, think of them as bullies, more afraid of you and God than they would like us to believe. Be very careful out there if you are doing Reiki or others forms of energy work without going directly to God and/or Christ. These beings can and will try to trick you. That is how I got tricked because they can imitate being of light. It is your relationship with God and/or Christ that protects you, not any relationships with so-called spiritual guides, psychics, angels or masters. The dark side will use fear and your weakest spot to try to control you, as well as your deepest desires. For most of us, our deepest desire is to be loved and to share love.

Best bet is to not depend upon anyone in the middle and learn how to talk to God yourself so that there is no more room for deceit or lies. We need spiritual guidance but what about not putting anyone else in the middle except for Christ as our High Priest. Learn to be strong in yourself and in relation to your Creator by developing a personal relationship with God and with Jesus Christ.

Besides, why are you so afraid of going to God first? Have you been told that it is not possible to do this yourself? Is it because you feel that you are not worthy of love and so you continue to place your trust in another being who is still in the middle between you and God and/or Christ? Are you afraid that if God does not accept you that you have nowhere else to go? What is the real reason that you place your trust in these psychics, guides, and/or other gods and things instead of going directly to GOD? Think about it.

I found unconditional love, forgiveness for everything that I thought I had done wrong, acceptance, support, kindness, guidance and sharing in going to God. It was only my pride and my feelings of unworthiness that got in the way.

Please see this article on how they are able to get into our lives. It explains very well about how we let darkness, evil and other things into our lives and how to keep them out. It is a Christian-based article but it still explains very well how these things come into our lives and how to remove them.

        Demons cannot just enter people any time they want to. They need a legal opening [or an invitation 
        by the person in some way] to do so.
[emphasis added] Knowledge of the things that open the door to 
        demons will also give us the knowledge of how to keep the door shut on them. It is also necessary in order
        to maintain our deliverance. What is the point of getting demons out, if they are only going to be let back
        in shortl

I think that trying to ignore our spirit and do it all alone is what contributes to our pain and suffering.  I learned the hard way that there is danger out there while doing this work. While I did much healing and recovery I was also in danger so I would give you fair warning without wanting to make you afraid. We are very much spirit and I think that there are many things that we can do to help God be real instead of only words and a little relationship. There is so much more to our spirits than many of us are experiencing. Many of us are only surviving and not really living as a result which is an uncomfortable place to be. I went looking for God because I wanted and I needed Him to be more in my life. I wanted to feel better and I was tired of being sad, depressed and in pain.

I personally feel that our spirits are suffering in this day and material age and if we can have some balance in our lives instead of being so focused on the physical side of life, then we can be healthier and happier. We would then be able to have balance in our lives in physical, mental, emotional and spiritual ways.

Information about the chakras and energy of the body.

Information about tuning forks, vibrational and sound treatments.

Great site with diagrams of the chakras, the vortexes of the chakras, locations, colors, minor chakras, energy flows in the body and much more. Take a look. We are energy and we are vibration and the diagrams at this site show it well.

“Plants and Music” experiment that you can do yourself. This article by Charles R. Kelley, Ph.D., discusses orgone energy but on page 13 it also has a very good discussion of the energetic “armor” that we put on or carry and how this affects our body and the flow of energy.

Here are a couple of videos for those who might just want to listen:  

  “The Seven Chakras Part 1 of 2” by burslemchakra.

“The Seven Chakras Part 2 of 2” by vurslemchakra.

So, now does "seeing red" makes more sense to you. Red comes from the color of the first chakra and thus anger coming up will reflect itself as red in the eyes. Demons have red  eyes (green on the astral which is another dimension or plane of existence and one of many) because they are coming from or living from base energies in the first chakra such as survival, anger, rage and the like. See this drawing for detail and it is Eyes of Rage

"Rose colored" glasses means that someone sees with the energy of love, which is pink, and thus love colors what they see in life. For me, fear was black, and so I saw a lot of darkness in my life because it was colored with fear. See this drawing of what my fear looked like for more information.

Okay, so now that you are a little more familiar with some terms and how the energies of the body work,

here are some examples of talking with my spirit and working with the energies in my body:

  1. Fear from the trauma of being stalked all the time and never knowing when the guy was going to show up. This energy was held in my lungs and was preventing me from taking deep breaths. You know how when you are scared and you cannot breathe well? This is how it affected my lungs and for years I could never take a deep breath.
  2. Grief from my sister’s death and relationships was stuck in the lungs and heart area.
  3. Relationship issues affected my second chakra or reproductive organs. Fibroids, ovarian cysts and extreme pain in the second chakra relating to pain in relationships because of my lack of communication skills and inability to say what I was feeling. Some of the painful energies that surrounded the abortion are still caught up in this chakra and affecting my life. Despite my best efforts in removing many layers around this issue, some pain still remains. There was guilt, shame and grief, among other feelings, caught up in my second chakra.
  4. The lack of energy running down into the legs. Not being fully present in this life or not feeling secure in my life.
  5. Anger and lots of it affected my first chakra or life force and blocked the force from flowing in this chakra area which is the sacral/groin area.
  6. Fear of dying as a result of the PTSD was caught in the heart which constricted the heart and prevented at least half of my life force from flowing into my body. This was biggest energy block and one I didn’t even know it was there until just recently. This was because the clearing of the energies in the core (spinal column and vital organs) of the body were the most traumatic energies and the “core” issues in my life. 
  7. Energy blockages (dirt) in the eyes from not wanting to see all the pain, fear, abuse, trauma and all of the other crazy things in this world because I didn't know how to handle it or let it go.
  8. Holding on to anger in the arms. My arms shook with this anger when it was released. Anger was held both in my arms and in my first chakra - groin area.
  9. Love in the second chakra (area of reproduction). There is something quite special about the love that comes out of this chakra. It is a feeling unlike any other that I have ever felt.
  10. Muscular pain and sensitivity, similar to fibromyalgia, resulting from feeling overwhelmed in all areas of my life. This was being energetically and physically “overwhelmed” in life for me as well as an indication of too much “pain” in my life. That is the energetic I feel from the illness of fibromyalgia. Too much pain in life or life is too overwhelming. This pain then manifests itself in the physical body. This illness, as with many others, starts in the energy bodies and then manifests itself in the physical body if the energy is not resolved or removed. I was living in a city and I was overwhelmed with the pollution especially, the noise, the city life, the stress of all the trauma symptoms surfacing, a home that was being thrashed by a tenant and all kinds of things.
  11. When I started drinking more juices, cleansing and working on the energy in my body, the symptoms of my illness started to clear. My physical, emotional and mental faculties got better. An alkaline balance in the body fluids helps keep one calm and mentally stable.
  12. Feeling my heart energy go from “death” to “life” and from “hard” to “soft.”  Releasing the fear from the trauma and feeling my heart change its rhythm to a calmer and steadier beat. This change in rhythm may not be measurable by any doctor but I feel it in my heart. This change in rhythm has happened three times now. The energy of pain and fear in the heart feels like a heart attack before and as it releases. I feel that many heart patients may have a lot of grief or pain energy lodged in the heart but this is my personal opinion and I have not worked with anyone who has released energy from the heart. I only presume this because of the energy that I hear in the sounds that heart patients make. The sounds are of grief or pain of some kind which has affected the heart and almost every person that I know who has heart difficulties makes these kinds of sounds. The heart is in the fourth chakra. Love energy changes the very quality of the physical  tissues in the heart and the body.
  13. Feeling stronger in my back and spine area after standing up to others, including angry men and spirits coming after me. These situations helped me to release that feeling of powerlessness that I felt when I was attacked. This helped me to feel so much stronger in my own life. The feeling that I could protect myself and be strong has changed my life for the better. After being attacked I never felt that I could protect myself and I never felt safe until now. I still have difficulty being around angry men and they scare me but it is easier.
  14. Fear is lodged in my spine. This is a “core” issue and thus affects the core of my body and the major internal organs. Fear also seems to pervade or be throughout my entire body as my whole body shakes at the moment while releasing the fear, mostly from the trauma. No wonder I ran away from every man that I thought could even get close to me in an emotional way. I like men and that is very sad for I ended up being mostly alone in trying to protect myself and keep myself “safe” from harm. I just didn’t know how to get past the fear. This would literally be "having no spine" or "spineless" as the energy of fear does not promote strength. Love promotes strength of the heart, of the mind, of the body, of everything in life.
  15. The energetic feeling of “bleeding” from the heart, the eyes and ears on occasion when energies were being released from those areas. This could be from blow to the body, trauma or some kind of emotional release.  Usually a feeling of bleeding energy meant that it was some kind of pain but not necessarily. On more than one occasion I felt this bleeding at least one day before the actual release of energy or feelings. Most of the time it happens right along with releasing the energies.
  16. Tears feeling like acid or burning my face as well as being soothing and healing. I think that perhaps fear, anger and other emotions and feelings affect our body chemistry in ways that we cannot even imagine at this time. If my tears feel like acid burning or a soothing wash, then what might all of that fear have done to my bodily tissues? How might all of that fear affected my body's chemistry or metabolism? I know that fear and grief in the heart area was preventing my life force from going to my heart, lungs, throat and brain. So how might any of these feelings affect brain chemistry or the body? What about grief? What about being angry all of the time? What might that do to the body as well? What about love? It seems that my mind has slowly come back around to "normal" or what it was like before I broke. It was love and compassion for the most part that helped me to recover. Might the energy of love have more of an effect on the body that we realize at this time? If the energy of love is so healing, how does it work - for the researchers and scientists out there? I know that love heals and soothes away my pain. It even changes the very vibration of my physical and energetic bodies, as well as my heart. Fear created intense irritability and high tension in my body and my heart but love produces calm, relaxation and joy. Love changes the energy of the very tissues of the body towards health and life.
  17. The love for myself that I felt, and feel now, when I have to protect myself. Very powerful.
  18. Hot flashes. I started having hot flashes a couple of years ago but they are gone now except for one every six months or so. If that. I felt at the time that this was my life force rising to let me know that something important was going on inside of me. I felt like this energy rising and creating heat in my body was trying to give me a message about my life. I paid attention to this energy and what it was trying to tell me instead of trying to stop the hot flashes with medication. As a result I felt more fire and more me inside that I had felt in a long time. It was as if the heat was trying to get my attention because it wanted to be released. Me wanted to be released from the prison that I was living in at the time. I was going through the outpatient program at that time. I let this energy rising be released and was rewarded with new energy and a new fire and zest for life. This energy was a part of my spirit that I had shoved aside, compromised or stuffed down along the way in life. I feel that if I would have stuffed these hot flashes that they would have gotten stronger and stronger because they were trying to tell me something energetically. Now that I paid attention I have more energy and no hot flashes.
  19. The opening of the heart area and feeling all the energy of life being released into my heart, lungs and chest area, filling that area once filled with so much fear with love, peace and new  energy.
  20. Intense fear and helplessness from the PTSD. A helplessness which came from not being able to fight back because I was overpowered by a very strong man. I did however, protect myself in some way, because I was not stronger than him and that retreat helped keep me alive at that time. However, that fear and helplessness stayed with me until just recently and it was there for about thirty years…I just kept on retreating any time any anger or any kind of conflict came up in my life.
  21. As a small child of about two or three (energetically feeling), I take Father’s hand and I confront the bad, bad man that has been haunting me. Because I know that I am strong with Father’s help, I tell the bad, bad man (demon) to leave me. He must, and I feel this energy leave my body. It is just this simple. I don’t know what happened to me at that age. I don’t remember anything traumatic and there was no sexual abuse in my family. Maybe it was the small child in me or I felt like a small child at the time. This energy or demonic was stuck in my head. I do recall asking for their help with my head trauma when I was doing Reiki energy work. I was tricked and I didn’t know that I was working with demons or fallen angels. I asked them to reach inside my head and soothe the energy. This is probably how it got in but it could have been from drugs and alcohol as well. Just that small invitation is all that it takes for them to come into your life or your body if you are not protected by God.
  22. At other times, I feel much more grown up and confront my attackers, but I am not alone.
  23. As far as the demonic entities that came into my energy field and hang around from my involvement with the dark side, sometimes I fight with them and sometimes I just tell them to go. Sometimes I ask Father to take care of it for me so that I can depend only upon Him. Many times I feel protected by Christ. It just depends and is very much an individual challenge and growth period. Try not to laugh at me too hard at this point. There are so many who are doing spells and working with "guides" and "angels" now that you may start to see more evidence of demonic possession. Demons and other not so nice things hang around drug and alcohol abusers, sexual abuse, murderers, satanic rituals, rapists, prostitution, war and anywhere else there are lower vibrational doings going on. These things are like food to them and if they can influence us to do more then all the better for them. They influence us or possess us through the "holes" in our energetic fields created by an unhealthy body, drugs and alcohol use, sexual abuse, trauma and other doings. Maybe you cannot see them but they are there are they are able to influence and possess people depending upon the level of invitation, knowingly or unknowingly. I'm not saying that mental illness is caused by demons because I do not feel that this is true in most instances. Just be aware though that these influences are out there. If we take away their food and their ability to influence us then they have no power anymore. Have hope. These things exist and are around many of us but they can be removed and your energetic fields made stronger. My energetic field gets stronger and more defined every day. What previously felt like very little to no definition and protection is now, with the help of God, and my own spirit much better defined and stronger.
  24. As the energy and the pain are cleared out of my head, I begin to feel that my brain is actually moving again with a flow and a pulse of energy. The energy in my head felt like one solid mass of hard, inflexible energy with that golf ball size ball of pain right in the front, slightly in front of and over the ears. That mass was the ungodly amount of emotional pain that I couldn’t stand before. I think some of the stuck energy was just all the fear, pain and negative thoughts clogging me up. My madness is caused by the overwhelming emotional pain energy of all of the pain in my life that I was unable to deal with and release. The maniacal laughter you hear is the echo and the only possible response by me sometimes in the face of such pain.  Now that lots of this energy has cleared, I no longer feel the pain and my brain feels like it is moving again inside my head – much like there is space between the brain and the skull where the fluids can circulate again. That’s the best way I can think to describe it as opposed to there being so much stuck energy that my brain could no longer move and pulse with life. My memory and my cognitive abilities have improved as the energy clears out of my head. I can think more clearly, even if still slower than I could in my days of working in law, but my thought processes have become more clear.
    My whole body is calmer that it has ever been. The energy in my body is slower and calmer, instead of being frightened and full of fear all of the time. This alone is a big relief. I feel like I am swimming in the ocean, smoothly and calmly, like in the aquarium videos in this book.

    Take a look at these videos to see what I mean:

    “Kuroshio Sea – 2nd largest aquarium tank in the world” by JohnRawlinson.
    “The World’s Largest Aquarium // Georgia Aquarium // Atlanta GA”  by LightbulbEnt. 

    This is what it feels like to live in a space of love and in harmony with God, at least for me.

    …and the list goes on…I find the energy work quite fascinating actually so I don’t mind most of the time. Sometimes it is a pretty rough go and other times it is very, very easy.

This is how it works. These are situations being resolved on different levels other than the physical by me working with God and His love. Other situations that are not described here have been resolved but these descriptions will show you how I work through the process of combining my mind, the energy in the body, God’s love and how it all works together. Sometimes images come into my mind, like the pumpkin carriage, and I use those to help me figure out what my spirit is saying to me. I try not to listen to energies from outside of me but only what is coming from me and the love from God but I still work on this daily. Some days I have no idea what I am doing but I know that I am protected. This is how wonderfully cool and amazing this work is to me. I like it very much and this is how most of my energy work is done, not in ways outside of me. I can feel the energies shift and move, what kind of energy is inside of me, what it feels like, what it sounds like, the message that it has for me and lots of other things. This is listening to your spirit and to God by going into your feelings. I suppose people could just remove the energies at this point and sometimes I do, but I find this stuff so interesting and amazing that I like actually working through the whole example. It is God's love that redeems and it comes from shared love in a mutual relationship, not taking from Him. I no longer feel that this is work and all of this comes up during the course of a normal day as part of the day. It isn't work for me. It's life and feeling like I belong somewhere.

While I think spirituality and making God my best friend has more to do with my recovery than anything else, here is some scientific information for those who like to see facts over faith for things that they cannot see. I recently borrowed a book from a friend of mine called Power vs. Force, by David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D.[1] In his book Dr. Hawkins gives values to the different feelings or energies. For example, reason is 400, unconditional love is 500, joy is 540, peace rates a 600. The scale goes higher up to enlightenment which is 700-1,000. On the low end of his scale, shame is 20, guilt is 30, apathy is 50, grief is 75, fear is 100, desire is 125, anger is 150 and 175 is pride. In the middle somewhat are courage at 200, neutrality at 250, willingness is 310 and acceptance is 350.

The point that I am trying to make here is to show you that anger, grief, pride and some other emotions or feelings are of a lower vibration that those of peace, joy and love. If we are harboring the energies of lower vibrations in our bodies then we are further away from God or we have fallen away from God's love or something like that. God doesn't leave us. It's just harder for us to connect with God when influenced by the lower vibrational energies such as fear or anger and it is easier for darkness or evil to influence us.

From my experience, God is love and He only wants us to contact Him and put Him first in our lives. If we can stay in higher vibrations like love then it is easier to connect with God and be protected by His love. The danger lies in that the dark side uses knowledge and love and thus I think it is easier for them to trick those of us who have not had much real love and emotional support in our lives. It also seems easier for them to appeal to those who are uncomfortable with their feelings, like I was, and who turn to science or those who feel that there is only a physical basis for life. So, one only needs maybe love, faith that God exists and a desire to put God first in life. I don't have all the answers. Maybe you guys can find some more of the answers yourselves.

I discuss the subject of energy and vibration more in my book based upon my experiences with working with the energies of feelings in my own body. Dr. Hawkins discusses the subject more from mathematical and psychological perspectives.

Warning - using science to try to ascend, clear your energetic fields or redeem yourself without going to God in your life is of the dark side and they will try to trick you. Be very careful as they appear to be very nice and they can show love. It is only God's love and grace that redeems you. Go INSIDE [learn to feel your own heart] yourself and go only to God and/or Christ. Do not put any ascended masters, masters of wisdom, gurus, priests, spiritual guides, psychics, angels or anyone else before God. Put God first in your life. I cannot emphasize this enough. It is because I found out the hard way what is out there in the other dimensions. We are more than physical beings though and our spirits are a very important part of us. Go inside and to GOD first. Stay away from psychic readings, tarot cards, channelings, witchcraft - white or black, spells and the like for your own safety. It is not necessary or needed to develop any spiritual "powers" and such to connect with God. Actually, it is probably better if you don't focus on trying to activate any "powers." These "powers" can be distracting and lead you in the wrong direction. Stay focused on what is inside of you and forget about those abilities unless directed by God.

PRAY to God and/or Jesus Christ for protection, love and support daily and before you do any working with your energies. Go inside yourself and into your own heart to make the connection with God.

[1]Hawkins, David  R., Power vs Force: An Anatomy of Consciousness, The Hidden Determinants of Human Behavior, West Sedona, AZ, Veritas Publishing, 2004, pp. 59-82.



About the eyes:    

The more that you connect with yourself and with God, the more the heart will register darkness by hurting. When you are connected with yourself and with the Creator/Christ your heart will hurt in the presence of darkness and emotions such as rage and fear, among other things. Fear of seeing things in the world helped my eyes to become very nearsighted. It was fear for the most part and an inability to deal with others and with life well. Love got rid of fear and helped me to be strong. It was in sharing love with God that I am able to be stronger and less afraid. I have help. I also no longer feel the need to look away, run from life or bury my head in the sand, so to speak.

     This leads to my conclusion regarding the influence of the eyes on the health of the body and brain: When you loose the ability to accommodate 
     the ciliary muscle in the eye for focused vision (near or far), you loose your primary ability of adapting to different life conditions as well, meaning
     no life pulsation and life fades away. It seems, adaptation of the human body to the surrounding world is heavily controlled by accommodation in 
     the Eye. 
    Also, functions related to eyesight take up more than one third of the grey matter in the brain, and added to these normal, conscious seeing 
     functions through the visual cortex (
here), important energetic, unconscious seeing functions for autonomic, vegetative functioning have central 
     positions in the brain in the light sensitive brain glands of the Hypothalamus, Hypophysis and Pineal gland (
here and here). Eyes are superior to 
     the other senses, shown by the fact that when collecting or constructing memories from the other senses, eyes are involved (
here, p.19-20). much more of our brain and our spirit and God could we connect with and ... how much more could we do if we took a closer look at this subject?


That feeling of slipping into another dimension so many years ago --- I recognize now that my body was so full of fear that I was literally slipping into a hell of some sort and into a different vibration. That is what fear, grief, terror and all those other feelings not of love held in can do to someone. So, if you feel like you are in hell --- climb out as fast and as best you can. Raise your energy vibration and contact with the love that is our Father and our Creator and our first, best love in life. Connect with that which will make you whole.


In fact, there is one fundamental law that all of nature obeys that mankind breaks every day. Now this is a law that has evolved over billions of years and the law is this: nothing in nature takes more than it needs and when it does it becomes subject to this law and it dies off. An ocean, the rainforest, the human body are all cooperatives. A redwood tree doesn’t take all of the soil’s nutrients, just what it needs to grow. A lion doesn’t kill every gazelle, just one.  We have a term for something in the body when it takes more than its share. We call it cancer.

 I AM, by Tom Shadyac, Entropy Films, 2009, 1:01:44 to 1:02:19.


The energy of the left eye represents the will. 

                                            The energy of the right eye represents love.




My whole energetic (or emotional) body shattered at one point. How can I possibly have repaired this shattering or breaking if I didn’t even know that it happened? I am so very tired at this moment. This goes beyond only body tired. This is tired beyond belief in all ways – mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. I know the body shattered or broke because the energy comes out and I do remember a time in my life when I just couldn’t take any more of anything. Breaking of the world maybe but it was my whole body shaking and the tiredness was just too much. It comes back now as my body is sick and failing despite my best efforts for years to repair the damage. I’m not so scared of dying as I am uncomfortable with the fact that I didn’t know that the fear and other stuff turned my heart into a blob of something and energetically blew out my heart, as well as the fracturing of my mind from being stalked and such. I didn’t even know that this stuff happened to me energetically on a conscious level, let alone be able to fix what had happened to my energetic body(ies). If some illnesses and diseases start in the energetic bodies then wouldn’t it be smart for us to know how to fix or heal these bodies? Sure, energy medicine helps as does a connection with God, but I do feel that starting to be able to feel our own energy as well as learning to have a connection with God so that we can address issues as they happen would be helpful. This would prevent us from having to look at the issue years and years later when so much damage has been done or a person is dying or severely ill.


Two days later I do feel better and that the emotional body can be healed. I’m not sure how long it will take or exactly how. The physical body is going to take a lot longer to heal and to help it get better and I don’t know if I can heal it or if I even have the energy left to heal it. This will require much in the way of fresh juices, raw foods and the Gerson protocol, slightly modified. I have a sore throat, a cough for at least six months now and my lungs hurt as well. I get short of breath and my bronchial tubes hurt. If I back off of the protocol or program then these symptoms return and I feel like I am going to die or well on my way to dying. So I have a choice here to face possible death because of what happened to me in so many ways and the legal and illegal abuses to my body. I don’t know what will happen and I don’t know if I will be able to fix it. I guess only time will tell. Maybe the energetic body can be fixed quickly or maybe not but I do feel that the physical body is going to take some measureable time and that it will need high quality nutrition to help it heal. As of right now I cannot eat meat, dairy, salt, bread ad pretty much all foods are omitted except for vegetables and fruits and flax oil. If I eat any of those things then my symptoms return quickly. Check out the nutritional program if you want to see what is allowed on the program.


I’m telling you this so that you know or have some more idea just what trauma, mental and emotional stress, abuse, emotional neglect, legal and illegal drugs and other factors may have on our bodies. Energetically when I got very sick, I did feel like I was having some kind of a “nervous breakdown” but I could never have told you at the time that my emotional body shattered and how that felt energetically. Nor did I know that it would do so much damage to me mentally or that it would have so much of an effect on my physical body. As a result of my experiences, maybe we can all begin to take a different view of some kinds of “mental illness” and some possible new ways to heal these injuries to people. Maybe we can start to take a different kind of look at the causes of different types of “mental illness.”


I don’t even begin to have a clue as to how to repair this damage and this breaking of myself so I ask God to help me and He does. I can certainly take care of myself by eating healthier, drinking juices, resting and possibly other things but I have no clear idea how to fix what happened.

A few days later and I feel much better.





The snarling wolf inside of me was because of the pain in my life, the rage and the desire to keep others away from me.


The world got a whole light brighter once God helped me deal with and release the anger with love and compassion and understanding.

Father truly does give me my daily bread. Every day He dresses me for the day and gives me His grace sufficient for the day.

Every time I receive the Holy Eucharist - Christ gives me the bread of life and what I need for the day.
I can taste it and feel the energy of the sacred host in my body and feel the presence of Christ.

                    Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.  Give us this day our daily 
                    bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against again 
                    and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil. Amen

These are the words from the Lord's prayer in Matthew 6:9-13, taken from the King James Bible (Authorized version of the scriptures):

9 Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.

10 Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.

11 Give us this day our daily bread.

12 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.

13 And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.

Read more:


 Kim Walker Smith - I Love Your Presence


                                                        Heaven comes to Earth in this music. 


 See more Jesus Culture and Hillsong music for more heaven comes to earth music.


Sometimes God calms the storm ... sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child.

                                                                                                             Sacred Heart Church, Bakersfield, 
                                                                                                             Church bulletin 6/28/15


             Christ IS the King.



    The King is Here (Live) - Kim Walker - CD Still Believe - Jesus Culture


Nobody can give a vibration a personality or feeling or stuff like that and there is no way that I could make up some of my experiences. This being knows more about me than I know.

God FEELS like more than just a vibration of energy to me. I FEEL love, comfort, communication, safety, strength and many other facets of being from this energy of love which is God.  Explain that if God is not real. I need no further explanation other than what I have experienced. 


I didn't realize just how much energy it was taking from my life and my body to hold this wound [the pain from the abortion] down, even though I had already released many layers with God's help. I feel today, after a very rough week, that I could turn cartwheels and dance for joy with God. This wound brings me to God's heart and His feet, as well as to Jesus because it was their love that I needed more than anything else in this world to heal my heart. I cannot even put into words that need so huge is it but yet at the same time, so healing is letting them help me and sharing that love and suffering with them. It's like when a person releases one single tear, knowing that one tear can mean more than 10,000. This is a tear of gratitude, of love, of suffering and mostly, of sharing that love with the greatest love my heart has ever known. God restores me daily to His ideal and brings me back to the love and joy that I felt as a child, but wiser perhaps, and definitely more free than I have been in a very long time. Wow. That's a miracle for me. 


                                                              Dance with me Jesus.

I got sick at the same time. I knew this was coming as I felt it for at least a week prior. I also felt my energies shift and I felt Jesus and Father helping me the whole time. They never left me alone. When we release huge energies, even with love, healing takes place. It also though, can release toxins and illness from the bodily tissues as emotions suppressed are also held in the body when we do not know how to deal with them. So, I had one of the highest fevers I have ever had. My whole body ached and I slept the whole night and most of the next day. As usual though, with a healing reaction (not an illness or disease - they are different) I woke up yesterday morning and felt pretty good. Later that afternoon after some vegetable juices and mineral broth and some fruit, along with the healing that comes from sharing love, I feel like I could dance with even more joy. All of this, thanks to my loving Father and Jesus Christ.



DOES MATTER WHAT YOU DO IN YOUR LIFE. IT DOES MATTER WHO YOU SERVE and whether you serve yourself, God or others.  IT DOES MATTER WHETHER YOU LOVE OR NOT, CHEAT, LIE, MURDER, RAPE, DRINK, DO DRUGS, LIVE FOR YOURSELF OR OTHERS or go out and help the poor, the homeless, the neighbor or anyone else.



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